AP Catches Up With the Brum

I asked in the post "Jesus Snubbed" if I was the only one to notice the Academy's failure to notice the year's most lucrative film. Obviously I wasn't.

To be fair, the second grossing film was "Fahrenheit 911" was also ignored but it doesn't count because that is Michael Moore's fault. For those who don't know it, Michael Moore didn't enter "911" in the documentary catagory, hoping he would get a "Best Picture" nod.

City of Boston Dodges Manhattan Bullet

On the News of the Oh Crap front, Operators of the FleetCenter have been auctioning off one day naming rights for the center until a permanent replacement is found.

Winning the auction was Kerry Konrad, a Manhattan Atoorney, who wanted to name the Center "The Derek Jeter Center." Officails have apparantly dodged the bullet, thanks to a condition allowing organizers to keep out obsene or inappropriate titles.

"That name may not be as bad as A-Rod," Jim Delaney (Arena Spokesman) said, "but it's still considered obscene."

See the full story here.

Jesus Snubbed

Surely I wasn't the only one to notice that Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Christ" was sorely unmentioned at this years Osars? "The Passion" was nominated for three awards but did not win a single Oscar. Above those it was not even nominated for was "best Director" and "Best Picture" and others that it should have been mentioned for.

To me it's just further proof that Hollywood is out of touch with the public. "The Passion" was the most wildly popular movie of the year. It made $611 Million worldwide and was the highest grossing movie in 2004. But since it's the Oscars, none of that matters.

That's the problem with the Oscars. Hollywood people get together and vote who they like the best. Who cares what you the consumer think.

Chris Rock had a bit that advertised this disparity during the Oscar show in which he interviewed people in a movie theatre. Most of them had never seen the movies nominated for best picture but all had seen "White Chicks" and other fluff movies. And the movie stars laughed and laughed. "Oh how funny that the poor proletariat doesn't know anything about films. Aren't we glad we're soooo sophisticated. We don't fall for these lesser films just because they are liked by the idiot public or because they are about Jesus. We're soooo smart and talented and look at my dress."

For The Voyeur Within

This was the idea of an artist who made a work of art which was somply a collection of postcards sent with people secrets written on them. Some of them are funny, some are terrible. It's strangely interesting and human.


"All that is human is honorable" -Eugene Ionesco from 'The Bald Soprano'

Another Reason to Hate The Yankees

I know that I've been talking alot about baseball lately, but as opening day approaches, the rhetoric steps up and I must respond. And now...the latest battle between my beloved Sox and the much maligned New York Yankees.

Here are the narcissistic and ridiculous comments by that most loathesome pile of human excrement, Alex Rodriguez. In a recent ESPN interview, A-Rod bragged about his off-season routine saying, "there are 650 or 700 other players who are sleeping, or taking their kids to school. But there's no way they're going to be running the stairs or doing what I'm doing."

You're right A-Rod, no one else works out...

The Redsox Response

"Like Rodriguez says," [Trot] Nixon said, "he's running stairs at 6 in the morning while I'm sleeping and taking my kids to school. I'm like, well I'm not a deadbeat dad, Alex."

and also:

"He's [Rodriquez] got a kid now, too, so I guess he'll have his limo driver take her to school," Nixon said.

Oh, Yeah...A-Rod's Also Stupid

"I think Brandon's a great pitcher. I played with him in high school." A-Rod is talking about BRONSON Arroyo. His name is Bronson, you retard. You played with him in high school but you don't know his name?! Oh, I guess you're too good to learn names and stuff.

I'm Faithful

For Valentine's day my wife bought me the book "Faithful" by Stephen King and Stewart O'Nan. I'll let you know if it's good. Do remember that, as a life-long Redsox Fan, my opinion will probably be biased.

It's the best gift a guy could get for Valentine's day, and for it, she was rewarded.

Then There's This Add.

I don't really remember what I promised Mastercard.

Kitchen Stories

Kitchen Stories is a small Norwegian film about a Swedish efficiency expert who comes to Norway to study the kitchen habits of bachelor Norwegians. Folke(the swedish researcher) and Isak (The Norwegian bachelor) strike an unlikely friendship despite rules that the researcher is not allowed to interact with the host.

Kitchen Stories is proof that, even today, a film doesn't need to have explosions and sex to be successful. It is extremely moving, yet remains subtle. The film contains lots of silence but remains engaging throughout. It seems to contain elements of Beckett while remaining humanist and realistic.

It's worth the small rental fee has in fact made it onto my must own list.

Farewell My Genius

Arthur Miller (1915-2005)

My favorite playwrite, Mr. Arthur Miller has passed on due to heart failure. Miller wrote "All My Sons," "Death of A Salesman," "The Crucible," and many others. His works are the standard by which American dramatists are judged.

from The AP Story: Playwright Edward Albee said Miller had paid him a compliment, saying "that my plays were `necessary.' I will go one step further and say that Arthur's plays are `essential.'"

You will be missed.

I Prefer to be Known as Sheol

My "Which Greek God Are You" test result:


Hades


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
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Me and My Hula Princess

98.9 Kiss FM here in OKC gave away Cici's pizza at nw23rd and Meridian. Someone called the Police saying that they were holding up traffic (never mind that it was 23rd/Meridian at 5:30 PM). I went out there and got in this picture with a naked guy which appeared on the radio show's website. Here it is:

Why Do Nerds Think They're Good at Impressions?

I must have heard an impression that finally drove me over the edge. Therefore, with the fear of being called many things, I am bringing my rant forward for both of my readers to see. I will explore, why do nerds think they're good at impressions. It is important to note that I used the word "think." In my experience nerds never are good at impressions, but they sure think they are. When I was a kid, I was a nerd and I can remember that I wanted nothing more than to be good at impressions. Alas, there was hope. I realized I wasn't good at impressions, so I bought a Tommy Hilfiger shirt and got a popular girlfriend and now I'm the magnificant, introverted book-reading man you see before you. Here are some reasons that nerds love impressions.

1) They have no identity of their own. By donning the voice of another (almost always a famous person), nerds connect themselves with the greatness that they will never achieve. This is not to take away from people like Bill Gates and Woody Allen. As we can see, they have reached to achieve greatness of their own...they don't do impressions. And while most nerds think that they are brainiacs, let's face it, most of them will end up in community colleges and working for Circuit City.

2)They have nothing better to do. While the rest of us our seeing to our sex-lives, nerds sit in front of their mirror and make faces at themselves in order to get the accents just right, which they never do. How many times have I heard my nerdy friends say to me, "I've been working on my..." You've been working on it? This implies practice and careful patience and discipline. All in the name of pretending to be someone else. Nerds, instead of spending all that time working on your voices, you may try using it to practice dental hygene. Women want a man who's handsome like Sean Connery, not who can "do a Sean Connery."

You might say "Well women aren't the most important thing to me...my comedy is." In which case, I pose the question; Are you gay? And I also make the following observation; You're not funny.

DiCaprio? Lifetime? Achievement?

30 year old Leonardo DiCaprio wins the Platinum Award at the Santa Barbara INternational Film Festival. The AP story is here.